OFFICE OF THE SECRETARY OF STATE

THE UNITED STATES HAS OFFICIALLY VOTED NO ON IRELAND'S APPLICATION TO JOIN NATO AND THE UNITED NATIONS. AS A FOUNDING MEMBER STATE OF BOTH RESPECTED ORGANISATIONS, IT IS OUR SACROSANCT DUTY TO UPHOLD GLOBAL STANDARDS AND STABILITY. THE APPLICATION FOR THE ADMISSION OF A SOCIALIST, SOME MAY EVEN SAY COMMUNIST, NATION IS ABHORRENT. THE GERMAN CHANCELLOR SHOULD TAKE A LONG HARD LOOK IN THE MIRROR BEFORE SPEAKING BEFORE HIS CITIZENS AGAIN. RONAN VALE IS A COMMUNIST WHO HAS MET WITH THE CHINESE COMMUNIST PARTY IN AN ATTEMPT TO DESTABILISE THE DEMOCRATICALLY ELECTED GOVERNMENTS OF VARIOUS NATIONS AROUND THE WORLD. IN RESPONSE TO IVANKA TRUMP, WHO IS CLEARLY SUFFERING FROM TRUMP DERANGEMENT SYNDROME, SHE CANNOT POSSIBLY BE CLAIMING AN ELECTORAL VICTORY WHEN REPUBLICANS VOTED OVERWHELMINGLY AGAINST HER RADICAL LEFT-WING BILL. SHE SHOULD FOCUS ON HER BOGUS ALTERNATIVE MEDICINE ASPIRATIONS RATHER THAN ATTEMPTING TO IMPOSE COMMUNISM ON THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. - MELANIA TRUMP